martha stewart

i figured out what my whole problem with the home tour is. it's not the fact that women are coming through my house to quite possibly critique my decorating style, it's more about the cleanliness of my house. i am not a martha stewart cleaner. i am a total tidy up person, not a "move everything to clean underneath it weekly" person. so now i get to spend a few hours friday cleaning like a crazy person, and it still will not be up to molly maid standards i'm sure, but it's all i'm doing cause that's who i am. at least my tree is gorgeous this year and i get to pick up my flowers on friday. woo hoo! so exciting.

my prayer for the season

i want to feel Christmas, how it used to be
with all of it's wonder falling on me
this season has felt so empty, oh for quite awhile
i wanna feel Christmas like a child

i wanna see snowflakes fall to the ground
my brothers and sisters all gathered around
singing "away in a manger" while we sit by the fire
i wanna feel Christmas like a child

it's been so long now, i cant' say
just when i lost my way
but i'm going back to how it was
when this day (season) meant everything
and we sent our time remembering
the baby child born for us

it's all about Jesus,asleep i the straw
this infant, this king, this saviour for all
so i don't need bells to be ringing
casuse i'll join with angels singing
GLORIA
and i can feel Christmas like a child

tai anderson

God grant me this remembrance of you so i don't get lost in the traditions and business of the season. let me sit quietly by the manger with your baby.

today's love poem

so staying in "the Lord as my lover" mind frame, these are the truths i received from him today;
s.o.s. 4:7 "you're beautiful from head to toe, my dear (eve), ...absolutely flawless." (ugh! flawless? i don't think you're looking at the right girl here.)
s.o.s. 4:9ish "you've captured my heart, dear (eve). you looked at me, and i fell in love. one look my way and i was hopelessly in love!" ( what, really?! that's all it took?)

that's all it took.

post retreat

the typical conversitions goes;
"how was retreat?"
"great!"
"oh good, what was so great?"
"uuummmmm............."

how do you start to try to glimpse some one into the healing, brokenness, wonders, and tears of those particular moments? you don't so you just say "oh, God did some amazing stuff.". which is true, but you'll never capture the essence of the moments shared.
so, what did i "learn" at retreat? i learned; i am still very broken and far too raw to face it still. as much i think i'm fine and so much better, my soul is still in a very preciously raw place. and it's going to take my and my love(Jesus), a long time to figure this one out for me. the grace lesson i received was one of rest with my lover. i didn't have a life changing, world altering weekend, but i did find the Lord as my lover and we spent time in rest. the hard part is coming back home to the craziness of day to day and knowing he's still calling me to that place of rest, and will be for quite awhile. so here's my fun quote from the weekend;
"if , then, you are wise, you will show yourself to be a reservoir rather than a canal. for a canal spreads abroad water as it receives it, but a reservoir waits until it is filled before overflowing, and thus communicates, without loss to itself, its super abundant water. "
Bernard of clairvaux 12th century

ramdon bits of chaos

my weeks seems to be rag tag pieces of chaos interwoven into days some how. so survival is of the up most importance. ha ha! at least i have the "arrogant worms" concert on thurday. this'll be the 3rd time i've seem them in concert. and it gets better each time. go you crazy canucks!

selah

what is it that's so great about the christmas tree. as soon as it's up and i'm sitting in it's glow the world is gone and there's really nothing but peace. it's one of the few things that can shut my brain off instantly and keep it still so i can just rest. maybe that's why i decorate so early. or it could just be cause i'm nuts! which i also openly embrace. this year with my house being in the home tour i had to write up a little blurb about my decorating style, and name my house. ugh! so i named it "icy feathers", sounds like some stripper's name. giggle. i was kind of nervous cause amy and i both ended up doing a peacock tree. but they look nothing alike . makes me relieved. all us girls in the home tour are supposed to go and see each other's homes the Friday night before the home tour, since we can't go during, but i'm not totally convinced that i'm going. sounds silly i know, but i'm totally intimidated by other people's decorating. I KNOW! so weird for me to be intimated by anything, buy it's true. so here's to overcoming self doubt and hopefully i'll suck it up and leave my house. woo hoo! it's retreat stuff tomorrow!

so tired

ugh i'm sleepy, but it's been a while so here's a quick note. yay! it's only 45ish sleeps till Christmas which also means retreat is next weekend and although i don't have tones to do left i still have some things to get and to get organized. it'll be great once we're there and all set up. God's gonna do some awesome stuff next weekend. too bad to all who aren't gonna be there. then it's only 2 weeks till the home tour. i have to put up my tree this weekend since i'm gone next weekend. that only gives me one flex weekend to put the final touches on the house of "icy feathers". sounds like a stripper name. he he. then it's a week till thanks christmaukka, he he! then 2 weeks till christmas! ah blessed christmas............

100!

hey 100 posts! woo hoo for me!

so you say crazy. i say gleeful fun! i must say i literally skipped into my kids room this morning and wished them a merry Christmas. that's right baby! it snowed! so i have started my decorating. oh ya! Christmas is coming! happy birthday Jesus!

are you kidding me?!

so i've been researching IBS diets and i think i'm gonna starve! i can't eat: coffee, caffeine, alcohol, carbonation, artificial sweeteners, artificial fats, and msg. i shouldn't eat: salad dressings, tarter sauce, cool whip, coconut, solid chocolate, olives, nuts, pastries, potato chips (unless they're baked), fried foods, anything skillet fried, shortening, margarine, any oils, mayonnaise, egg yolks, dairy, poultry dark meat and skin, and red meat. SERIOUSLY! what am i left with? ugh, this is really gonna take some getting used to. then there's a whole list of things i have to eat in conjunction with a different list of foods and only at certain times. whole wheat, whole grains, seeds, nuts, popcorn, beans, lentils, berries, grapes, raisins, cherries, pineapple, rhubarb, melon, peaches, nectarines, apricots, pears, citrus fruits, apple peels, dates, prunes, peas, green beans, bell peppers, corn, eggplant, cucumber, tomatoes, celery, onions, shallots,leeks, garlic, cabbage, brussel sprouts, broccoli, cauliflower, sprouts, fresh herbs. trust me when i say the list of totally safe foods is not long. cause there's not much left! well, here's to a hungrier, healthier me!